Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
