Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Randomize
