Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
