found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
