I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
