butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
