from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
