Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
