I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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