is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
