so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
