i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
