Porn is love you can see.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize