you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
