I heard we made out
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
