are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
