i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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