brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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