Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
