he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
