Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
