Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize