You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I have post one night stand depression
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