I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
