found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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