Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
