I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
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