he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
