question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
