I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
