It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize