I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
