Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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