Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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