Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
