oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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