exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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