dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
