How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize
