god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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