We're facebook friends in real life
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
