he wants to bone in the snuggie
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
