I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
