You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
