Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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