he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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