Sry I called you an 8
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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