my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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