His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
