U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
