So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
